Tales from the Sandbox

What’s going on Sports Fans? Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Just a quick note from the world’s only prison where the inmates have no desire to go outside the wire …

As you all know I am currently deployed over in the International Zone (IZ) in beautiful downtown Baghdad, Iraq. The crown jewel of Mesopotamia … the cradle of civilization … the epicenter for U.S. Armed forces in Iraq. I was lucky enough to land a gig working in the Admin Support section for the Directorate of Interior Affairs (DoIA), Multi-National Security Transition Command-Iraq (MNSTC-I, pronounced men-sticky). Our primary mission w/in MNSTC-I is to organize, train, and equip the Iraqi Security Forces (ISF). Working w/ the Iraqis, MNSTC-I is responsible for taking new recruits through basic and specialized training. Within DoIA, our mission is to assist the Ministry of Interior (Iraq) to complete generation of professional, credible police forces (their words, not mine) while developing institutional capacity to acquire, train, develop, manage, sustain, and resource those forces, leading to self-reliance and maintenance of the rule of law in Iraq. Or the term the two-star used, Iraqi Good Enough (more on that later).

My little slice of heaven (Admin Support) is responsible for a myriad of tasks ranging from property book management, personnel management, postal operations, client support administration (CSA), records management, and a slew of other miscellaneous nonsense. As for my duties, I am the Information Management Officer (IMO, the Army’s equivalent to the Air Force’s CSA program) and SharePoint Knowledge manager. I’m also responsible for the general oversight of the day to day operation of the Admin Support section, i.e. I baby sit three junior enlisted Army soldiers to prevent them form doing something stupid (trust me, this is an every day job) . This last duty will seriously test my will to live, but more on the dynamics of my office later.

The trip over the pond wasn’t as terrible as some in the past. The plane left on time out of Baltimore and made its way to Ramstein Air Base, Germany. And my layover in Baltimore was made a little more enjoyable w/ a visit from my brother from another mother. Hey Darryel, thanks for making the trip from D.C. to BWI. I sure do appreciate the effort … that was awesome! Back to the trip … the APOD (Aerial Port of Debarkation) at Ramstein AB was very nice. There was an USO w/ access to the Internet, a Subway, and a very nice coffee shop. Thank God I grabbed something from Subway and the coffee shop to take w/ me on our next leg to Aviano AB, Italy, because no sooner had I gotten on the jet than we were informed that conditions down at Aviano AB were not conducive for us to depart. Thus, we were delayed for 2 hours unit the airfield reopened. Once we were cleared to travel, it took another hour to de-ice the aircraft. So that’s three hours sitting on the tarmac at Ramstein AB. Wait, it gets better …

Now we’re in transit to Aviano AB for what should be a 90 minute flight … well after circling Aviano for close to 3 hours we were finally diverted to Venice to land. And because of security issues, we were not allowed to exit the plane. So there we sat waiting for bus transportation to be arranged for the folks getting on/off at Aviano AB. Oh ya, did I mention we had several, SEVERAL, families on board w/ us. Ya, lots and lots of little kids under the age of three that A) didn’t really enjoy the trip across the pond, and 2) didn’t enjoy being cooped up on the plane since Ramstein. Needless to say, the service members headed down range were glad to see the little tykes debark in Italy.

Due to these events, we are now 6 hours behind schedule. And that actually turned out to be a good thing. We eventually landed @ Al Udeid AB in Qatar around 6 in the morning, which sure beats midnight. Once at Al Udeid, we were indoctrinated into the AOR (Area of Responsibility) w/ a multitude of briefings. What not to do in theater, what not to do in theater, and most importantly, WHAT NOT TO DO WHILE IN THEATER! First rule of Fight Club is that you do not talk about Fight Club and the second rule of Fight Club is that YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB! No pornographic material, no battery/hand operated boyfriends (BOBs/HOBs), no alcohol, no crystal meth, no fireworks, no propane or propane byproducts and so forth and so on. Fireworks … really … somebody in the past has tried to bring fireworks into the country. Really? Damn hillbilly! So after five hours of mandatory fun we were finally released to find our transitory tent and get some rest till the next leg of our trip.

Now let’s talk about the desert oasis called Al Udeid AB …